09-02-2019 02:34 AM
I so want to answer your question..
I wish that someone could have ansewerred my questions also
09-02-2019 10:05 AM
09-02-2019 02:19 PM
hello again @outlander
Having insight about ourselves is something that we gain by looking at ourselves honestly and wanting to know more and more about what makes us who we are..
Many people do not have this...
Using the phrase "do not waste it" sounds a bit brutal now..so apologies there...I know that you would take it how it was meant though..
Recognising our insight and using it in our day to day interactions with others...thoughts about our anxieties or any thoughts we have...enables us to understand others better ...using what we have discovered about ourselves can be a benchmark on looking at another's situation from their perspective..
Tapping into that insight when we are anxious about something as you have mentioned upcoming appointments..
Most people are anxious about medical appointments to a certain degree...anxiety is a natural emotion..
major anxiety is different..
attempting to settle yourself in the time leading up to the appointment by looking at it from another's point of view..therefore separating the major anxiety from it...recognising that you do have the anxiety.,..you have justified cause..the appointment is important for your ongoing health...put the focus on the reasons for having the appointment..
If you are seeing this person for the first time let them know that you are very anxious due to a past experience...that is all that you need say...they will help you feel more at ease and respect you for your honesty.
riding a horse again after that long is a huge achievement... you must have felt on top of the world..
hold onto that image...that feeling..be proud...
Sorry to hear about the decline in your pop's health...dementia is a cruel disease...sadly anger is one of the symptoms..
A friend of ours has just been diagnosed with mild dementia...has had it for some time.,
Our two other friends with cancer have both got it growing back..one other friend has his in remission at present..
my sister 's has improved in some ways and worsened in others..her specialist is hoping that it has reached a plateau and will not change..
Life can be so very trying.
There still are good moments to be treasured.
The calves ...yes...I see some when I travel down a road just the other side of town ..they are multi coloured ..absolutely adorable.,
well stiffening up ..time to get off of here..
catch you next time I am on here 💚
09-02-2019 03:20 PM
no, I dont think 'do not waste it' was brutal at all, I dont think you ever come across as anything but caring actually.
Thank you for explaining what you meant, I feel im a little slow sometimes at knowing or understanding what some things mean. I think im understanding what you mean a lot more. Learning how to tap into that insight can be hard though or finding ways to use it more rather than letting our minds run away with out thoughts too. We are always learning though which is a good thing.
It was good to be riding again but I dont think ill be riding that often. I feel ive lost a lot of my mojo in that regard, I get quite a lot of enjoyment watching others- kids esp riding and laughing and just enjoying themselves just as it should be. It was really good to watch sisters doing just that yesterday and watching them accomplish something new and be proud of themselves for it. That was more the highlight of the day more than getting back on.
Life can be very tiring indeed. Im sorry to hear about your friends and family's illnesses. Its hard isnt it when theres not much we can do for them. But yes your right there are still those good moments to be treasured, I think many often forget or more like gets brushed aside when we are stuck in a dark place ourselves.
Yes they are adorable, I love seeing the newborns in spring. So cute.
10-02-2019 04:24 PM
Thank you @outlander
I did not think that you would misunderstand my phrasing in the other post...thought best to qualify to be on the safe side..
I know that I am a very sensitive person and have at times misunderstood comments from others...
on other occasions I have understood only too well..
Please don't tell yourself that you are slow at understanding or knowing...
Believe me you are leaps ahead not only in your own age group ....
I have been a questioner all of my life...much to the chagrin of family...work colleagues....holding up meetings where others would say nothing just wanting to get the meeting over with...if I had a question I saw it as a waste of time for everyone if I did not ask...I actually found myself making new friends this way over the years...shyer people would come up to me afterwards and thank me as they said that they wanted to ask themselves but felt silly...
I have probably discussed this on here before....whatever...
I continue to this day to ask many questions especially in the medical world where I feel that so much information is withheld from us..
I was discouraged from a young age to speak up...during troughs of issues with my health .I worked very hard at asking every question that I needed to.
You will find your own way to grow in this regard...in fact you are already on the journey..
How lovely to feel such joy and pride watching your sisters...Yes laughing is something that is so very good for us and at the moment still is free.
No tax on laughter yet!
Are there any youth groups or community groups close by where you might be able to help out with young folk? I think that you would be invaluable in that area...understanding at the same time that you have little free time at the moment..
time to move off of the chair and stretch..
hello to all others
I have decided not to tag others anymore unless they specifically tag me somewhere...I try to show support button..
I have not much energy for trying to work out where everyone is at..
taking breaks from the forums is helping me...
I still like to check in every now and again though
I know that most people with whom I have chatted over the times understand that which is comforting..
I seem to remember vaguely that you were making a quilt or a blanket? How did that work out?
Your art and your photography?
take care 💚
10-02-2019 04:40 PM
Over here I can write a little more in my own inimitable style of lengthy responses...
I copy and pasted your post to me
Hi @Sophia1 i question our relationship sometimes... relationship meaning involvement with one another on the forums... it appears in my mind to be somewhat dysfunctional...
I truly have been thinking of you Eude and had some concerns that you might take my absences from the forums as something about you in some way possibly.
This could not be further from the truth.
I had reached a stage where I had to take time out for my mental and physical health... There was again so much happening in my real world that was very painful to endure..
I agree "dysfunctional" could be one way of looking at it..a term bandied around in certain fields ...
For me our relationship on the forums has not changed...I feel a strong bond developed over the long period that we had discussions....ironed out misunderstandings...gave support on both sides..
I particularly want to thank you for your support...in the latter months your words were so caring and kind..
I also realise that part of my struggle with "my family member" might cause you to feel triggered in some way.. This would be totally understandable. if was the case..
In stepping back I have helped myself...time away from here has been beneficial in many ways for me...
I will not be on the forums every day...or even know when...
I would love for you to leave messages if that is something that would be of benefit to you..
I put no pressure on you at all Eude...
Talk to me when and if you want to...I will find you and respond when I can..
You have a special place in my heart Eude...You have been so very brave opening up about so much...I know that your posts have already and will continue to help others in the future..
So please do what Eude wants and feels is best for Eude.. 💚💜💛🐾
10-02-2019 04:42 PM
Thats okay @Sophia1 , no need to tag me. I am subscribed to your thread here, so am getting all your updates. I do understand a lack of energy in which to catch up with everyone, I am that way myself. So I only subscribe to a special select few people ... you happen to be one of those. I like to get your updates, even if I dont always have much to say.
I'm glad to hear you are doing okay, and that your break from the forums is helping you. I'm sure everyone understand that, as it can be a distressing place to be sometimes.
Please take good care of yourself, and do what you need to do in ensuring continued progress in both your mental and physical health.
10-02-2019 04:52 PM
a very quick thank you for such a warmhearted..caring response.
I am so honoured to be included in your special select group..
I feel the same towards you..
I have not been able to read back and did not want to write anything that might cause you pain..
I understand that you have been carrying such heavy burdens for so long..
you have endured so much in a caring role that at times has further added to your load..
you do not give up on people @Sherry you and I have a kindred spirit in this regard....those we love and cherish even when there are times where we no longer recognise them..
please keep on looking after Sherry
11-02-2019 07:52 PM - edited 11-02-2019 08:00 PM
@Sophia1it's good to be in contact with you again... just the fact of there being someone who is prepared to write in length is a very comforting feeling...
On my part... in my life... in my world... I've just been taking on each day as best i can... the underlying illness is still very present... the depot side effects are very strong and there's a whole range of comorbidity problems... this just about sums up my life basically...
There's other stuff going on... but it seems all vein and futile sometimes... i struggle with building and maintaining good relationships (have plenty of problematic relationships)... I'm very selective about who i spend time with (and even these relationships are still very problematic)...
Have a safe place to call home... have some assets... all big responsibilities and requiring $$$ to unkeep and maintain...
Need to constantly rely on my faith to get me through though... definitely lots of issues and problems to get through each day...
There's also a physical and material aspect of my life... I'm aging... so I'm deteriorating... I am active but it is all based around necessity... I'm got physical problems but my mental stuff seems to override it + some of my physical problems have been caused by years of illness, treatment...
11-02-2019 10:00 PM
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