14-03-2019 08:09 PM
I have BPD, diagnosed 9 years ago.
For a while now I’ve been self destructing ie stopping all my meds. I’ve been told that It’s a form of self harm/sabotage.
I don’t understand the reason why I do this. The thing I do know is that when this happens I spiral right out of control and end up in hospital.
I also thought - do I do this as a cry for help? To be listened to snd ti be validated.
I wonder also if there’s a pattern of behaviour before i get to the point of self sabotage with my meds.
Are there others on here with BPD that have done or do the same. And if so how do you stop yourself.
14-03-2019 09:56 PM
15-03-2019 06:59 AM
Sometimes I don’t do what my psych suggest too.
Can I ask is there a reason for you? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.
I know I struggle to get better because I have a huge fear of being abandoned by my support people. It’s an overwhelming fear. Scary.
It’s so hard having BPD. It’s a real struggle and hard to explain to others.
15-03-2019 07:22 AM
15-03-2019 07:36 AM
@outlander No what I was asking was do you have a reason why you self harm or sabotage? Like fir me it’s to get people to listen to me. Also I think there’s more deep seated reasons but haven’t explored that yet.
I was just wondering. Xx
15-03-2019 07:40 AM
yeah I struggle a lot with abandonment. I was abandoned by my parents at a really difficult time and I’ve never got over it.
Today I’m starting to feel destructive. I don’t know why.
15-03-2019 07:44 AM
15-03-2019 07:44 AM
I am sorry to hear your support worker has left and that you are struggling with this and that it has triggered the abandonment thought for you. I just want to remind you that there are always supports around should you need to talk to someone.
Do you have someone you can speak to right now? Unfortunately, the Forums aren’t a counselling or crisis service, however you can call any of the following services for immediate support:
Lifeline: 13 11 14 or Crisis Chat
Suicide call back service: 1300 659 467 or online counselling
Samaritans: 135 247
If in immediate danger: 000
Take care of yourself.
15-03-2019 07:46 AM
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