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Unsteady

Hey everyone, today I'm going into a semi social setting that could be a bit tricky - a friend of mine who I'm going  with has an ex wife who is a viper and she will be there. I have looked into this as insightfully as my head will allow me to... Do I want to do this to create a possible drama (so at home with drama & turmoil) or for the right reasons. To get out, support my friend, watch his daughters performance. I'd like to think my motivation is the latter - but there's a tiny bit of me that gets the thrill of being in a situation that could create a little chaos. 

 

Anybody else relate to this? I've made my mind up that I'll go (after hours and hours of deliberating - you can just imagine 😆) but I do have to be careful as I'm in a fairly good place atm and don't want to be tipped back into the abyss. 

 

Would love love love to hear if anyone else has these situations and how they've gone if thats ok to ask? I don't want to upset anyone. 

 

Love n hugs my BPD fam X🐞X

5 REPLIES 5

Re: Unsteady

Hi again @Snowflake11 🙂 Sounds like you really thought it through yesterday and approached it carefully. How did it go?

Re: Unsteady

Hey @CheerBear 😀 it went really well! Thanks for asking. I was nervous as all get out but I did it. Going to this event, and coffee before it, is a huge leap for me. I did tho, take more pills than normal but I so wanted to get thru it. Next time I'll try without thinking I need to medicate. I can't wait to be free of my attachments to féel good drugs.

Re: Unsteady

Well done for going. Im sure the friend appreciated the effort. It is not a drama or slipping into an abyss necessarily but possibly an opportunity to see this as a way forward and steps in a healthy direction. Causing chaos can be a great thrill and confidence boost too. 

Re: Unsteady

Hey @Reachingoutfs, thanks! Yeah he really did appreciate it and I enjoyed it. One things for sure, regardless of anything I'm proud of myself for going and that's a big thing! ☺️

Re: Unsteady

Sounds to me like you went for all the right reasons! Good luck.

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