30-08-2019 04:59 PM
I’d be the first person to stick my hand up and admit that I don’t understand how the male brain works, the more I try the less I understand.
So maybe a few male forumites might be able to answer me this? How important is sex in a relationship? From holding hands, to kissing, to full on intimacy? Is sex a deal breaker for a man in a relationship?
And more importantly, does sex mean LOVE ????
30-08-2019 06:00 PM
30-08-2019 06:15 PM
@Razzle Hey Razzle I am not a bloke but yeah I have found that no sex is a deal breaker. It happened with my ex. He just went looking elsewhere. Which is fine becauase I didnt find him attractive anymore
30-08-2019 07:24 PM
Thank @Hamsolo01 for your reply. I understand the wet cement analogy. I also get what you said about oldies that can’t perform but are still in love.
It makes me wonder then if it’s more important for men early in a relationship. I wonder if it becomes a deal breaker in a long term relationship but changes when they hit their more senior years??
Is sex LOVE for the entire relationship (talking long term) or does it flit between love and just sex ?
Does a man always feel rejected if the woman says no, does he feel rejected of LOVE or sex ??
30-08-2019 07:27 PM
Hi pea @greenpea
Thanks for the response. I get so many mixed signals, I really don’t know what goes on in my husbands head.
Huge back story behind my questions, I’m hoping to gain some kind of insight into what is going on in my own situation.
30-08-2019 07:31 PM
@Razzle Don't forget you are an important part of the equation. Don't forget about you.
30-08-2019 07:43 PM
@greenpea Yeah, I hear what you are saying. I know my views are skewed, my CSA will never allow me to see it any differently. My husband has never had anything like that happen to him and I just don’t understand what it’s all about for him
30-08-2019 07:54 PM
@Razzle Men and this is a over generalization (so any male reading this please do not feel I am insulting you in any shape or form0..... are just so different to women. I remember growing up and we knew a married couple where the man was actually out there gay and the woman straight. They had a good partnership. It suited them both.....
I have had (like many women I guess) had experiences which would fall under the headig of csa. It didnt affect me sexually (I think ....) but definitely affected the way I relate to men in general. I am happy being single. Interestingly enough alot of women I know are ....
30-08-2019 08:11 PM
@greenpea I’m glad you are happy being single. I’m starting to feel that I would be fine single too.
My husband feels sex is LOVE, and if I reject sex then I’m rejecting LOVE. I’ve never seen sex as LOVE, quite the opposite in fact, I wouldn’t care if I never had sex ever again.
But like I said, I know my views are skewed, I just wish I could understand why it’s such a big deal for men.
Maybe it’s a big deal for women and could be a deal breaker for a woman too?
30-08-2019 08:19 PM
@Razzle Well I am getting to be an old pea and that probably has alot to do with my lack of wanting sex or having a partner.
My best friend is 81!!! (I am a few years younger than her though ).
Good night Razzle. I am about to turn into a pumpkin .Take care. peaxx
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